we need some new and more powerful swears
how to give a good handjob
- bop it
- pull it
- twist it
You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!
Cha cha real smooth
none of you ever touch a penis
HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE
Let’s say it’s 6.15pm and you’re going home (alone of course), after an unusually hard day on the job. You’re really tired, upset and frustrated. Suddenly you start experiencing severe pain in your chest that starts to drag out into your arm and up into your jaw. You are only about five miles from the hospital nearest your home. Unfortunately you don’t know if you’ll be able to make it that far. You have been trained in CPR, but the guy that taught the course did not tell you how to perform it on yourself..!!
NOW HOW TO SURVIVE A HEART ATTACK WHEN ALONE…
Since many people are alone when they suffer a heart attack, without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness.
However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously.
A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest.
A breath and a cough must be repeated about every two seconds without let-up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.
Deep breaths get oxygen into the lungs and coughing movements squeeze the heart and keep the blood circulating.
The squeezing pressure on the heart also helps it regain normal rhythm. In this way, heart attack victims can perhaps buy precious time to get themselves to a phone and dial 911.
Rather than sharing another joke please contribute by broadcasting this which can save a person’s life!
Be prepared and become part of the solution. Get your free next-of-kin notification card today. Click here: https://www.InCaseOfEmergencyCard.com/
major signal boost
Nepalese police dogs, after being smeared with vermillion on their foreheads and marigold garlands placed around their necks on the occasion of the Tihar (Diwali) festival in Kathmandu, on November 13, 2012. On Tihar, it is customary in Nepal for people to offer blessings to dogs, which, according to Hindu tradition, are the messengers of Yamaraj, the god of death. (Prakash Mathema/AFP/Getty Images)
police dog DEATH SQUAD for the death god
me: enough small talk
as far as i can tell from my dash there’s some sort of gay musical olympics going on that only europe was invited to
i farted in the apple store and everyone got mad but it wasnt my fault they don’t have Windows